Ok, this is the last part of the brilliant Crapper's series, you guys must have been awaiting for this moment haven't you?
Anyway, this issue is of one very popular topic among youngsters (which I dunno why is it popular), Love...
As past readers would know, Crapper has diagnosed a theory named ficmen theory. It focuses mostly on the attitude of love from various people and the ways on doing it. I'm not gonna disgress it here, i'm sick of relating the ficmen theory around to people and in the end they don't understand a shit i'm talking about.
Anyway just remember ficmen theory has 3 main concepts:
1. Beauty is in the eyes of a beholder
2. Friendliness doesn't equal to signs of attraction
3. No matter how unwilling you are to admit the fact, it is true that both guys and girls do appreciate the attention of the opposite sex. Ok, stop shaking your heads girls, it's true!! And you know it deep in your heart!!
4. People are fickle. You see one, you get one, you'll crave another. It's just natural... at least for the guys. Ok, a little too negative on this one.
For 1st law, I dun think i need to elaborate further, different guys love different girls and vice versa. So it's not unnatural for fat people to get loved. Fat people like me... hopefully... at least take it like u're doing charity will ya?
For 2nd law, people must realise that a girl at times may be very friendly and open to you, doing actions like taking neoprints picture with you or even having some intimate moments, but do realise, that does not equal to love. People are fickle and relating to the 3rd law, they just want your attention, but when it cuts to the end, they don't love you at all. They just treat you as a buddy. Cruel... but it's reality...
For 3rd law, I guess it's only human nature which can answer this. No matter what when it reaches a period of your life, you will just crave for it. You can call that the "despo" period. But regardlessly, you will just wish there will be at least one of the opposite sex to give you attention, you may not realise it... but when you're walking down the streets or shopping centres, you see cute guys with great bod or pretty girls wearing rather seductive clothing and a cute face. Ask yourself one thing... you feel irritated? you feel disgusted? you feel uneasy? Or whatever strange feelings you sense, that is an evidence to it. Unknowingly or unwittingly, it'll appear.
For 4th law, not only girls are fickle. Guys are as well. When i mean fickle, i'm refering to case of relationships. But it depends on how strong your determination and your self conscious is. If you have strong discipline and responsibility, it won't be a problem. But if you're not... i think you know yourself.
Ok, get over with the ficmen theory, I'll just go about crapping my shit.
I've been somewhat... played with in the game of love i think. Throughout my life all i've seen are mostly pessimistic and negative relationship. There are very very few examples in which i've seen a happy and eternal relationship... But I guess, that's the trend with youngsters nowaday maybe?
... I sound very old do i?
People in Background: Ya u do.
Old people are filled with experience, love them. Anyway, I see so many cases of love life... and i find them immature and neverlasting. Hate me all you want, but I feel a true case of love being more sacred than just going out on dates everyday and watching movies, those are just the process which are overclaimed and overexposed in shows. Why not change a date to being when we go out and jam our ass off or we stay at home and study or even better! Go to each other's house and cook up meals for each other? My dream girl is someone who can cook meals for my family and the girl to prepare the meal in harmony with my mom. Yay.
Anyway, I'm thinking too much, what girls like to cook now are just chocolate cakes and brownies. Sweet sweet stuff anyway. When have you ever seen a girl cooked up fried rice for you???? Very rare i tell you. I even suspect most girls now can't chump up a proper Fried Rice.
I'm going off topic... Anyway, love should not be just for a show or something to boast off to your friends. Why is it that i see so many of such cases? Cause of this thing called infatuation.
Relating to the 2nd and 3rd law of ficmen. Imagine you're a guy and a girl goes out with you, going shopping and taking photos. The girl is cute and someone popular, after she does this, will you have some funny feelings that maybe she likes you???
Reality sucks and unfortunately i'm a realist so i'm gonna shoot more of the reality sux shit back to you. Girl going out with u, taking intimate pics with you, those are not signs of attraction. Guy willing to go shopping with you, showing extra attention or sending you home, those are not signs of attraction. But sadly, it's these signs of attraction which will create into a scene of infatuation and in the end....
Guy sms girl: I like you
Girl sms guy: I kinda like you too
Guy sms girl: Hmmm... Can i be ur boyfriend?
Girl sms guy: Hmmm... ok...
And VOILA! There you have it, a typical case of infatuation causing into a serious relationship trouble. And soon enough...after 4 weeks...
Guy sms girl: ... I want to break up with you...
Girl sms guy: ... Ok lor! Who likes to be with you you fucker! Your dick can't even stand straight!
Guy sms girl: oh yea?! And your tits looks like a pair of papayas hanging loosely! Cheebye!
After soon enough, they will have sex as they keep on hurling sexual abuses at each other and getting excited.
Ok, enough of my pervertness, but have you readers get a somewhat idea of what i wanna say?
People now care more of Cen Jing Yong You instead of Tian Chang Di Jiu, and i despise that thought. Why go around hurting people's hurt by breaking up with them if you aren't show of your feelings in the first place? Love doesn't form all of a sudden and it'll only form gradually. Even lasting relationship which form out of infatuation is due to people getting to know more about each other through having a relationship and that infatuation turning into love. But do realise, IT'S NOT ALWAYS TRUE TO THINK INFATUATION WILL BECOME LOVE! That is just an optimistic view and I'm a pessimist.
So do remember, don't anyhow get into a relationship unless you're true and certain of your love. And DIFFERENTIATE between infatuation and love, it's very very different. Also, make sure you remember of your fickle nature.
Also, do take note that break ups do happen. When it does, don't come running to me saying how depressed you are, i'll just scold you for not making the correct choice in the first place.
If you wanna go long pia or jump off a building. I advice you to choose a more silent death, give those HDB cleaners a break and don't make a mess of their work. If you have the courage to die, why won't you have the courage to accept the break up?
That's all Crapper has to say. This is the last of Crapper's post and I assume alot of people will be totally delighted at hearing it. But don't worry, the True Takahina is here.
Whatever Takahina writes here, is fully affected by all the people around him. Whatever you don't agree, you are fully responsible for it.
Sunday, June 19, 2005
Saturday, June 11, 2005
Crapper's last words Part 2 - Immature Singaporean
Have you guys notice that most thingys done by Singaporeans have several features?
1. Blogs with very small words with very colourful background adding no help to the contents.
2. They like to WrItE lIkE tHiS and still it does not help in adding contents or extra meaning.
3. Squeezing you like a piece of shit when you in some countdown or autograph session or something like that.
4. Complain that they are going out with their lover and don't know what colour their panties should be. (Common problem among girls. Boys don't give a fuck. Might as well don't wear. Make things later much more simpler and fast-moving.)
5. Whine over the fact that you're constantly getting killed in Counter Strike and complaining like some fuckanathans so loudly that the whole LAN shop can hear.
6. Boast of your girlfriend's pic all over to other friends... or even some acquaintance. Do note that acquaintance is different from friends.
7. Saying of how large your dick is or the largest size prove of a man your tut spot has swallowed. (You can find some of these evidence in Friendster. Reality is scary)
Ok, I can't think of more now, but everyone has their share of immaturity. Even me! Yup, even me. I know you readers find it hard to believe right? ^_-
People in background: We find it hard to believe you had not done those you mentioned above.
Ok ok... I did my fair share of boasting some neoprints with another girl to my buddies. And I shall tell you all to not ask me on who that girl is. Cause I will not answer, only give hints. Yeah, I'm kaobeiing now that I have these neoprints, what bui song ar?!
Now the thing is most of these acts may not be of much importance to others. Doesn't affect them much as well. However, it's an act of courtesy and consideration on your part. I mean, you don't go around squeezing people in an autograph session do you? And you don't go and shout, "Oi, oi oi oi oi! Stop killing me lah!! Don't bomb me lah! Pek chiek u know! Kenina!" in a Lan Shop. It's bloody irritating.
Immaturity is never a fault. But it's an act of how dumb and senseless you can be. WrItE lIkE tHiS, wHaT iN tHe BlOoDy WoRlD cAn YoU aChIeVe?! Damn it, i spent thrice as much time wasting my intelligence on it. The time taken you write like that, i can write out "knnbccb" 20 times.
Of course, I've seen a girl, teenage. Able to write LiKe ThIs at lightning speed. I even suspect she can TyPe FaStEr like this than writing normally like this. So imagine she's writing some compo on a computer.
"OnE bRiGhT sHiNy DaY, mY fAtHeR fUcKeD mY mOtHeR... bLaH bLaH bLaH..."
And she handed it over to her english teacher.
English Teacher, "WtF is this?!"
When the girl receives that compo. She fails it despite having a vivid and outstanding story. Reason?
"Grammer fail. You need more tutoring of basic capitalling of words. Capital letters should be written for the first letter of the first word of a sentence. Not throughout with big small big small like some baby."
Hear that? You people? So stop. It's only of show of how immature you are and no, it doesn't make you hip and impressive. Writing words like those shown below will then show people of being impressive...
"This personal lubricating factor of mine provides no liberty or any form of realitism and what it only presents is just a rather impromptu and inefficient visual perspective of the true differentiating system for both mentally and physically in the grey area of feminity and masculinity."
What is this personal lubricating factor of mine? Answer the question and you stand to win a prize!
People in Background: Show off.
Shut up lah. Anyway, get my point?
As i stated above, it's not wrong to be immature. Just remember not to be inconsiderate. Writing in ThIs FoRm may not be inconsiderate to others, it only shows of your dumbness. However, some other form of inconsideration is bad.
You know how young people like to go to countdown events or so? Why is it that some males despite not being party animal likes to go to such events?
They are perverts! Just like me! But let me state first they I don't do such things. My form of pervertness is much more mature.
They like to go such events, cause it's squeezy. I'm sure the clever you would know why they like to squeeze. Cause they can squeeze. Girls going to such will get taken liberties till the stage whereby they won't know it's who. Or they can't care too much anymore. Call me traditional, but i don't allow my gf to get touched all over. Not that i have any. I'm still an eligible man. Love me. So girls, think again before you're allowed to get squeezed.
Also, one more thing. Bloggers should never, never ever make your readers get pek chiek. You want people to write your blog, you don't be some immature idiots putting a large large background of some cutesy character and then what you read in only a small little box.
People in Background: Those are Tagboards lah. Sua ku lah u.
Fuck u PIB, I'm not. Go check around and you can find people writting like that. You have to squirm your eyes to check out what you're writting. People, do realise that blog is for reading, not for appreciating abstract art.
Frankly, there are just too many examples of immaturity happening in all of life. We do them too as well. But whether what we do does any form of irritance or inconsiderate actions to others. That is the more important factor to comprehend.
Immaturity is not a fault. Inconsiderate is.
Learn that Singaporeans. That includes me as well.
1. Blogs with very small words with very colourful background adding no help to the contents.
2. They like to WrItE lIkE tHiS and still it does not help in adding contents or extra meaning.
3. Squeezing you like a piece of shit when you in some countdown or autograph session or something like that.
4. Complain that they are going out with their lover and don't know what colour their panties should be. (Common problem among girls. Boys don't give a fuck. Might as well don't wear. Make things later much more simpler and fast-moving.)
5. Whine over the fact that you're constantly getting killed in Counter Strike and complaining like some fuckanathans so loudly that the whole LAN shop can hear.
6. Boast of your girlfriend's pic all over to other friends... or even some acquaintance. Do note that acquaintance is different from friends.
7. Saying of how large your dick is or the largest size prove of a man your tut spot has swallowed. (You can find some of these evidence in Friendster. Reality is scary)
Ok, I can't think of more now, but everyone has their share of immaturity. Even me! Yup, even me. I know you readers find it hard to believe right? ^_-
People in background: We find it hard to believe you had not done those you mentioned above.
Ok ok... I did my fair share of boasting some neoprints with another girl to my buddies. And I shall tell you all to not ask me on who that girl is. Cause I will not answer, only give hints. Yeah, I'm kaobeiing now that I have these neoprints, what bui song ar?!
Now the thing is most of these acts may not be of much importance to others. Doesn't affect them much as well. However, it's an act of courtesy and consideration on your part. I mean, you don't go around squeezing people in an autograph session do you? And you don't go and shout, "Oi, oi oi oi oi! Stop killing me lah!! Don't bomb me lah! Pek chiek u know! Kenina!" in a Lan Shop. It's bloody irritating.
Immaturity is never a fault. But it's an act of how dumb and senseless you can be. WrItE lIkE tHiS, wHaT iN tHe BlOoDy WoRlD cAn YoU aChIeVe?! Damn it, i spent thrice as much time wasting my intelligence on it. The time taken you write like that, i can write out "knnbccb" 20 times.
Of course, I've seen a girl, teenage. Able to write LiKe ThIs at lightning speed. I even suspect she can TyPe FaStEr like this than writing normally like this. So imagine she's writing some compo on a computer.
"OnE bRiGhT sHiNy DaY, mY fAtHeR fUcKeD mY mOtHeR... bLaH bLaH bLaH..."
And she handed it over to her english teacher.
English Teacher, "WtF is this?!"
When the girl receives that compo. She fails it despite having a vivid and outstanding story. Reason?
"Grammer fail. You need more tutoring of basic capitalling of words. Capital letters should be written for the first letter of the first word of a sentence. Not throughout with big small big small like some baby."
Hear that? You people? So stop. It's only of show of how immature you are and no, it doesn't make you hip and impressive. Writing words like those shown below will then show people of being impressive...
"This personal lubricating factor of mine provides no liberty or any form of realitism and what it only presents is just a rather impromptu and inefficient visual perspective of the true differentiating system for both mentally and physically in the grey area of feminity and masculinity."
What is this personal lubricating factor of mine? Answer the question and you stand to win a prize!
People in Background: Show off.
Shut up lah. Anyway, get my point?
As i stated above, it's not wrong to be immature. Just remember not to be inconsiderate. Writing in ThIs FoRm may not be inconsiderate to others, it only shows of your dumbness. However, some other form of inconsideration is bad.
You know how young people like to go to countdown events or so? Why is it that some males despite not being party animal likes to go to such events?
They are perverts! Just like me! But let me state first they I don't do such things. My form of pervertness is much more mature.
They like to go such events, cause it's squeezy. I'm sure the clever you would know why they like to squeeze. Cause they can squeeze. Girls going to such will get taken liberties till the stage whereby they won't know it's who. Or they can't care too much anymore. Call me traditional, but i don't allow my gf to get touched all over. Not that i have any. I'm still an eligible man. Love me. So girls, think again before you're allowed to get squeezed.
Also, one more thing. Bloggers should never, never ever make your readers get pek chiek. You want people to write your blog, you don't be some immature idiots putting a large large background of some cutesy character and then what you read in only a small little box.
People in Background: Those are Tagboards lah. Sua ku lah u.
Fuck u PIB, I'm not. Go check around and you can find people writting like that. You have to squirm your eyes to check out what you're writting. People, do realise that blog is for reading, not for appreciating abstract art.
Frankly, there are just too many examples of immaturity happening in all of life. We do them too as well. But whether what we do does any form of irritance or inconsiderate actions to others. That is the more important factor to comprehend.
Immaturity is not a fault. Inconsiderate is.
Learn that Singaporeans. That includes me as well.
Crapper's last words Part 1 - Posts and Porns
When I first started on blogging such an activity, I first named it "My Reviews, My Novel, My Thoughts". My first initial thought is on expressing what I felt and wanted to say of in this society, followed by also showing off my reviews and novels. Obviously, it wasn't much of a success, nobody comments, nobody cares. Whatever. So I tried out another blog, "Crap..." But when I started that, I would have to say I didn't know it'll end in this way.
This is Crapper's last words, few weeks since his death.
I'm not a very vocal person, I don't kao bei kao bu everyday and neither do I express my thoughts readily, so I thought of using blog as a tool to help ease my thoughts out. And indeed it was successful.... too succeesful. It came to the state whereby whatever I write, people will be offended. Then with the shuai shuai Ben's help, I came to realise my mistakes and reduced the form of vulgarities used in it. Fuckanathan.
Ok, so I changed it. Deleted alot of my mental intelligence and edited a shitload of crap spoke by me. It's now, a very peaceful blog. But kenina something happened.
I tried as much as possible, not to offend anybody at all. After all I'm a very amiable person. ^^ But still people get cheebyically offended and this time it's my brother himself. For no reason I don't know why should he even be offended at all. Instead he should be touched and have that nice warmy feelings that christians always boast of during christmas. But no, he take it that i'm intruding on his private life and indeed i'm pissed to have my kind intentions taken as an insult.
This is an insult to my brilliance.
So the crapped up me and very abiding to my principles (I stated that if anybody made an official complain, I'll shut it off), I went ahead with it. Nobody realises the true meaning behind all the pun in my post anyway. So...SO i may be scolding u all without u all realising it.
But now, after so much crapping onto "Crap..." I wondered, what is the fault in opening up and saying whatever you want? You often hear me scolding myself, saying how pervertic i am, saying how stupid and dumb looking i am. But the fact is, wat's wrong with being pervertic? What's wrong with being fat looking?
I officially say here then.
I'm a pervert.
I know more about sex than most guys my age.
And if you remove my moustache and whiten my face a little, I may even look like a girl.
And I'm loving it.
Will this characteristics change the outlook people know you? Does it affect how others see you? I doubt so.
My friends all know how horny I am, but really, you ask them and how will they feel?
"No lah, Crapper not that horny as he spoke lah, he only oogles at gals but have no guts to go chio them"
Ok, that statement is a little defamatory to me, but still it acts as another piece of evidence to go with the fact that i always defame myself, so why is it that when i defame someone else they go all cranky and fucked up?? And to be frank, when I reframed my blog, I never insulted any people at all. The most vulgar I did is just confront the government a little. So why be so fucked up sia?!
Oh ya, going into the topic of porn. Why are some people so bothered with the issue of it? There are always 2 most general type of response coming from porn.
1. Wa lao, sibei disgusting leh u!
2. Wa lao, sibei on leh u!
For me, I'm neither. I'm the special one. Talk to me about porn and most likely my response is:
Wa lao, sibei lousy! I've seen better!
Anyway, the thing is when writing blogs, I don't get the reason for why should we be so offended, unless it's aimed totally at you, there's no reason to be fucked up. Bloggers are trying to create an image of themselves, like being vulgar, being kao bei kao bu, watever. That's the power of internet for people can't truly know you.
So the next time when i'm talking bout porn, dun be afraid for I won't pick you up and rape you senseless, no. I don't do that.
But let me ask again, who have not watched even 1 porn in your life when u're 17? Are you able to be so law abiding to the age of 18 then u'll watch?
I don't think so.
So, why care in calling me disgusting? Is watching yourself naked disgusting? Is cleaning your privates a disgusting move?
If it is, you might as well don't clean it, let it rot and be filled with the smell of urine.
This is Crapper's last words, few weeks since his death.
I'm not a very vocal person, I don't kao bei kao bu everyday and neither do I express my thoughts readily, so I thought of using blog as a tool to help ease my thoughts out. And indeed it was successful.... too succeesful. It came to the state whereby whatever I write, people will be offended. Then with the shuai shuai Ben's help, I came to realise my mistakes and reduced the form of vulgarities used in it. Fuckanathan.
Ok, so I changed it. Deleted alot of my mental intelligence and edited a shitload of crap spoke by me. It's now, a very peaceful blog. But kenina something happened.
I tried as much as possible, not to offend anybody at all. After all I'm a very amiable person. ^^ But still people get cheebyically offended and this time it's my brother himself. For no reason I don't know why should he even be offended at all. Instead he should be touched and have that nice warmy feelings that christians always boast of during christmas. But no, he take it that i'm intruding on his private life and indeed i'm pissed to have my kind intentions taken as an insult.
This is an insult to my brilliance.
So the crapped up me and very abiding to my principles (I stated that if anybody made an official complain, I'll shut it off), I went ahead with it. Nobody realises the true meaning behind all the pun in my post anyway. So...SO i may be scolding u all without u all realising it.
But now, after so much crapping onto "Crap..." I wondered, what is the fault in opening up and saying whatever you want? You often hear me scolding myself, saying how pervertic i am, saying how stupid and dumb looking i am. But the fact is, wat's wrong with being pervertic? What's wrong with being fat looking?
I officially say here then.
I'm a pervert.
I know more about sex than most guys my age.
And if you remove my moustache and whiten my face a little, I may even look like a girl.
And I'm loving it.
Will this characteristics change the outlook people know you? Does it affect how others see you? I doubt so.
My friends all know how horny I am, but really, you ask them and how will they feel?
"No lah, Crapper not that horny as he spoke lah, he only oogles at gals but have no guts to go chio them"
Ok, that statement is a little defamatory to me, but still it acts as another piece of evidence to go with the fact that i always defame myself, so why is it that when i defame someone else they go all cranky and fucked up?? And to be frank, when I reframed my blog, I never insulted any people at all. The most vulgar I did is just confront the government a little. So why be so fucked up sia?!
Oh ya, going into the topic of porn. Why are some people so bothered with the issue of it? There are always 2 most general type of response coming from porn.
1. Wa lao, sibei disgusting leh u!
2. Wa lao, sibei on leh u!
For me, I'm neither. I'm the special one. Talk to me about porn and most likely my response is:
Wa lao, sibei lousy! I've seen better!
Anyway, the thing is when writing blogs, I don't get the reason for why should we be so offended, unless it's aimed totally at you, there's no reason to be fucked up. Bloggers are trying to create an image of themselves, like being vulgar, being kao bei kao bu, watever. That's the power of internet for people can't truly know you.
So the next time when i'm talking bout porn, dun be afraid for I won't pick you up and rape you senseless, no. I don't do that.
But let me ask again, who have not watched even 1 porn in your life when u're 17? Are you able to be so law abiding to the age of 18 then u'll watch?
I don't think so.
So, why care in calling me disgusting? Is watching yourself naked disgusting? Is cleaning your privates a disgusting move?
If it is, you might as well don't clean it, let it rot and be filled with the smell of urine.
Return of Takahina
I was once known as the notorious Crapper.
I was once known as the inventer for the infamous people in background.
But my true name is Takahina.
........................
Ok lah, those above are all crap lah. So in case for those first time encountering the Crapper experience, you're welcomed to read for more in future. By the way, I did say that the Crapper is "gone". So, after the trilogy posts of Crapper's Last Words. Crapper would not be likely to appear again. Even if he does, he'll most likely to treated as a person to be remembered along with the scrap data deleted and uncached by those stupid Search Engines.
So, Crapper's last words part 1 will be up next. (Some may have already read on it on Mouldy-Fart's blog)
One more info, it'll be best if you have information for how I once wrote. Crapper is created solely through my own creativity and if there are any similarity, it'll be just coincidence.
I was once known as the inventer for the infamous people in background.
But my true name is Takahina.
........................
Ok lah, those above are all crap lah. So in case for those first time encountering the Crapper experience, you're welcomed to read for more in future. By the way, I did say that the Crapper is "gone". So, after the trilogy posts of Crapper's Last Words. Crapper would not be likely to appear again. Even if he does, he'll most likely to treated as a person to be remembered along with the scrap data deleted and uncached by those stupid Search Engines.
So, Crapper's last words part 1 will be up next. (Some may have already read on it on Mouldy-Fart's blog)
One more info, it'll be best if you have information for how I once wrote. Crapper is created solely through my own creativity and if there are any similarity, it'll be just coincidence.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)